Love, Lust & Commitment Discussion | Afest

Love, Lust & Commitment Discussion | Afest

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#Subscribe #MarisaPeer #Attention

When it comes to online dating, how do you catch the attention of potential suitors? Does it really boil down to your profile photo and dating preferences?

In this interactive talk at A-Fest about sexuality and relationships, a panel of relationship experts starring Marissa Peer, Esther Perel, and Dan Savage, informs us that there are several personality variables that you need to focus on when dating in the digital age.

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In this video, “Love, Lust & Commitment Discussion” Mindvalley CEO Vishen Lakhiani and relationship experts host an interactive Q & A on modern dating and give valuable relationship tips.

VIDEO HIGHLIGHTS
02:52 Mistakes women usually do with their partners
04:20 Stop trying to change things that are not gonna change
08:05 Three doors of entry into sex
10:41 If there would be a new relationship vow like a marriage vow, what would it be?
13:20 How would you deal with someone who is not fully present with you?
15:37 What is the one thing that is a current struggle in relationships and how to resolve them?
19:10 Sex is the glue which makes a relationship really special
22:55 How the spouses became the best friend?
24:46 Is the container in which we’re defining relationships today flawed in some way?
30:06 There is only one commitment that is repeated twice in the Bible
34:50 How to deal with the mind?
39:37 Is there a particular exercise or ritual or practice that you think one can integrate their relationship to create a more enjoyable beautiful experience?
44:42 We come on the planet for two needs
46:20 Why sexual compatibility is huge?
52:41 Q/A between Esther Perel, Dan Savage & Marisa Peer
59:12 Closing piece of advice

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Along with having a strong connection, the relationship experts on the panel discussed the importance of couples investing the energy to focus on their sexuality.

By incorporating creativity and romanticism into your marriage or relationship, the panel of relationship experts believe this a sure way to fulfill relationship goals and prevent divorce from happening in the future.

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47 Comments

  1. There are experts that simplify an issue and then there are you who have complicated and caused issues of what was once a part of life. If I hear you and when I hear you I get to a point where man knows least about it self.

  2. Many women play mind games because they want to exercise a sense of control in their relationship. Most of the time, such mind games will affect your relationship adversely. You will be able to cope with these mind games played by your girlfriend in a better way, if you have the knack of identifying them.

  3. OMG.. this IS excellent !! I wish me and my X had heard AND believed this 20 yrs ago….. Now I hope (pray) that as I date new men…. we WILL listen to this in hopes that this will encourage US to be more authentic, honest, flexible, AND L O V I N G !!! THANKS !!!

  4. The guy in blacks, language cheapens the reality of this topic and the show. His language is NOT relevant in many cultures that are interested in these generic issues. Makes him sound like he is insecure and needing shock approach to become a “hit”…

  5. I enjoy watching this so much because I’ve been married 30 year’s this May. I know I have such higher sex drive then my wife’s. I’m always offering to dry my wife’s sexy back and I’m telling her that gets me turned on like I get a get a hard on. But drying her back. I only wish my wife would sexually would be like nine.

  6. At 27:30 – yes!!! Thank you Dan!! We were together 27 yrs – raised 3 wonderful children &. had a thriving business together for 25 yrs – and we are still great friends & love each other for who we are today. Our lives together were undoubtedly a success

  7. Esther Perel should Have a separate exclusive session for herself only. She feels more competent and more convincing . With all respect to the other speakers , yet i like how they include the homosexuality in the topic because actually it is no less than any other heterosexual relationship.

  8. Hi, Folks.
    Marisa has hit on some valid points starting at about 20.40 when she talks about asking if the object of your affections/LUST could also be your best friend. She then goes on to say that it is very hard to keep the 'hot-n-heavy' part of the relationship going and that nature doesn't want you to keep it going. Good points there.

    I'm just a 'pore, dumm bulldozer operator' but I am also a keen observer of people and of their relationships and interactions. One thing that I have observed and that has been borne in some counselling work that I have done in the past is that the 'hot-n-heavy' part seems to last somewhere between 18 months and about 3 years.

    This leads me to suspect that nature's 'plan' is to get a man and a woman together for long enough to have them conceive a child, have it born and get it at least started on the path to self-sufficiency.

    It also leads me to wonder if men and women were ever intended to live in long-term monogamous relationships, whether we have indeed evolved from our ape ancestors as much as we might like to think we have.

    More power to those who can make it work 'until death do them part' but statistics indicate that around 50% marriages now end in divorce and that around 75% of those divorces are initiated by women.

    I have my own ideas on the 'whys' and the 'wherefores' of this but that's for another time – maybe.

    Just my 0.02.

    You all have a wonderful day. Best wishes. Deas Plant.

  9. This guy is annoying and disgusting ! And he should totally stop cursing and learn how to express and pass his feeling on a better way

  10. There are times when the “f” word is perfect in a public speech or discussion. Those times are exceptionally rare though, and careful consideration needs to be given to the make up of your audience. Mark’s “shit in your mouth” comment was an absolute low point for me. Savage’s relentless use of extreme profanity is like someone smoking in public: It may be fun for you, but unfortunately there’s no way the non-smokers around you can get away from it without leaving. And even though I heartily agree with the sentiment expressed, the ITMFA on his tee shirt is yet more shock jock fare. Some of Mark’s language may be appropriate on a Howard Stern broadcast, but not on a panel with two classy and respectable women. I did not say they are prudish women, but certainly they are women who, just by the fact of their presence on the panel, should not be subjected to Mark’s vulgarity without their permission. The same thing goes for respecting the diverse audience. You know, sometimes a little poison is just what is needed to kill the rat eating grain from your silos, but wisdom says there is no need to fill your barns with an endless river of Raid. The worst part is that so much of Savage’s core message is spot on and needs to be heard by a wider audience, but sadly the wider audience may never hear it because of the endless and needless profanity. You can tell Savage is brilliant, and I wish he would invest more of his intelligence crafting a better delivery. I’m sure the haters will now pile on, and go ahead. If you think I am the only person who listened to this and felt this way, you are wrong.

  11. I've been following Ester because this subject as old as it is has been the result of horrific problems. People need to become selective in choosing a partner and learn how to communicate

  12. Thank you for such openminded, informative, and indeed entertaining conversation! I appreciate everyone's knowledge, however Esther was , for me, the most informative, straightforward realistic speaker! The other two had great other sides of the stories that are valid, but it felt as just entertaining stories. Esther is definitely far advanced professional in her for field for such short interviews, yet she killed it as a boss!

  13. The male on the panel made a comment about monogamy being "unnatural" and then said whatever stance you take on relationships, you shouldn't put others down for their approach. (paraphrasing)

  14. Rarely a divorce will be amicable and "mutual acknowledgment about time well spent together in growth" my friend. Most of all that happens after years… Years of being divorced and both have moved on with a different partner… And sometimes it doesn't.