Celeste Headlee: 10 ways to have a better conversation | TED

Celeste Headlee: 10 ways to have a better conversation | TED

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  1. 1: Be 100% present in the moment
    – Don't worry about what you did yesterday or what you'll be doing tomorrow
    2: Enter a conversation ready to learn something new
    – Be modest, and let go of your biases and opinions
    3: Use open ended questions
    – Who, What, When, Where, Why. Give people the opportunity to describe and explain their answer.
    4: Go with the flow
    – Let the conversation flow naturally like a river, don't try to redirect the current anywhere else but downstream
    5: If you don't know, then say so
    – Don't pretend you know what you're talking about when you really don't
    6: Don't make a conversation about yourself
    – Take the opportunity to listen to the speaker and learn about their experiences, don't hijack the conversation
    7: Don't repeat the same phrase over and over again
    – Insanity is defined by doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting a different outcome each time
    8: Leave out boring details
    – Unless you're making a Wikipedia article, no one cares about the tiny details
    9: Listen
    – It takes effort to actually and effectively listen, but strive to actually understand what someone is talking about
    10: Be brief

  2. 1. Be present. Forget about everything else and focus on the conversation.

    2. It’s a conversation, so you need to be prepared to listen most of the time.

    3. Use smart questions. Let people speak their thoughts and not presume that you know all of their feelings.

    4. Go with the flow. Let things happen.

    5. Don’t presume you know everything. It’s okay to not have a clue about something. Let it clear for you and for everyone. Be interested to learn, and that’s an awesome position to be on.

    6. All experiences are individual. And, more importantly, it is not about you. You don't need to take that moment to prove how amazing you are or how much you've suffered.

    7. Do not repeat yourself often. It’s not necessary, unless someone asks for it. Let things go and go with them.

    8. Try not to force yourself to remember all details perfectly. Just talk about it. Again, let it go. Be with it.

    9. Most of us don't listen with the intent to understand. We listen with the intent to reply. So, listen.

    10. Go out, talk to people, listen to people, and, most importantly, be prepared to be amazed.

  3. Thank you , thank you and bless you Celeste. Someone who believes in the power of conversation. Ram Dass wrote a book titled "Be Here Now". Hear me, See me, Touch me… You are beautiful.

  4. I would have to believe that during the America civil war — we were much more divided than we are now. American history is full of contention – over very important topics. Historians often glosses over the ugly to feature the virtues.

  5. On the whole, this video was very helpful. The one thing I don't agree with is her position on repeating back (ie, don't repeat back). From personal experience in certain situations with an increasing population of participants with special needs, repeating back has been extremely helpful to understand their perspective.

  6. How did you people enjoy your Cov Jab and subsiquently getting the virus anyway?
    Works like no vaccine, lets you get sick from the thing it is supposed to prevent.
    Why aren't you people feeling stupid yet? A vaccine that doesn't vaccinate is not a vaccine.